"What Should We Call Me?" Awards

This semester, I have 425 students, each with their own special and unique name. Or not, if their name is Lily. I have sixteen students named Lily. In this blog post, each name will fight to death to be known as the best (or worst) of their nomenclature.

Athletes 
(we're counting pro-wrestlers as athletes, by the way...)
Randy Orton, CM Punk, Kobe, Lebron James, Iverson, The Rock, Cena, Undertaker Triple H

Winner: Undertaker Triple H. Imagine me saying, "Ok, so, what is the conflict of this story? Anyone? Anyone? Undertaker Triple H?"

Apparently Undertaker Triple H is a combination of the names of these two wrestlers.
Incidentally, the gentleman on the left was the star of my latest nightmare.

Definitely Boys Names
Peach, Stunning, Goldust, Bright, Rainbow

Winner: Goldust. Not a real word, which is interesting because he's one of my most well-spoken students.

Country Club Members
Scofield, Bond, Winston, Hunter

Winner: Winston.

That Thing That Explains the Science in a Sci-Fi movie
Protoss Judicator YZF, Maxime Testard, Quentun Stark

Winner: Protoss Judicator YZF, although I call him YZF for short. "The inter-dimensional time portal is being altered by the Protoss Judicator YZF... better adjust the Quentun Stark and resume the hyper-connection in the Maxime Testard!"

Duets 
(kids who sit next to each other in class)
Wendy + Wency, Apple + Jax, Jas + Aum, Zoro + Sparta, Mike H + Mike L, Angelica + Cynthia (SHE'S A REALLY COOL DANCER!) Water Z. and Water W. (not typos, they're both named Water. Both. Named. Water.)

Winner: Apple + Jax. The two Mikes came in a close second, because they're both insanely tiny and don't speak any English, but that's more of a joke for me. Apple Jax is better.

Hey, these don't taste like apples!

Well, That's a Word...
Burrows, Demon, Tyrant, Echo, Sirius, Leisurely, Tank

Winner: Demon. The first day of class, I asked if she knew what the word meant. She recited a dictionary-perfect definition. Demon, OK then.

Random Letters Put Together Randomly
(Male Category)
Zomber, Catschen, Tenimpelia, Elic, Parkel, Airloy, Gank, Rance, Foren, Saxia, Relouis

Winner: Tenimpelia. Seriously... where did that come from? Lucky for Tenimpelia, I can't pronounce his name so I never call on him in class.

Random Letters Put Together Randomly
(Female category)
Prayal, Berya, Misaya, Vlinn, Lintu (Grey Dante), Marman

Winner: Lintu (AKA Gret Dante). Lintu destroyed the name card that the students keep on their desks (come on guys, 425 students, I need those damn name cards) and so I insisted she make a new one. Instead of writing her name "Lintu" she wrote "Grey Dante" which makes her name doubly strange. Annoyed, I insisted she go by Lintu. These kids love changing their names on me, it's highly unfair! I actually remembered her name was Lintu! I should get some credit for that! You also may remember her from the infamous "Her Name is Rio" scandal.

Other
Eagle, Panda, JK Rowling, Herbert

Winner: Herbert. I mean, clearly.

The best part of this funny names ordeal is that many of these students are the best at English in their class. So even though their English is really great, they still chose these bizarre names. With over 400 students, the students with stranger names are easier for me to remember.